MikeyHav

good day readers and bloggers alike. well today was a shttie one for me mikey... first it was less then four hours of fucking sleep for me b/c i was doing homework all day sunday and into monday early morning. then off to school which was ok there werent alot of my follow classmaters there today. but then came home and had to go to work early instead at my 5p.m. start but that didnt bother me at all. other then that fact that i am trying to put together the staff reunion for this past summers staff and that isnt going good at all. i called randy and talked about some new dates but something came to my eyes that we may not be able to do the new dates. on top of that i am beginning to feel that poeple are starting to get on my fucking back about the reunion so i e-mailed randy saying that he is going to put the whole thing together and i will let poeple know about when it is and were it is. that is it. It has felt like camp all over for me poeple getting on my back about things and descions i have to make and probody make some people mad at me or upset like i did at summer camp b/c of the way i ran camp by the rules. poeople i am sorry for being the bad guy at camp but everything fucking come falling ontop of me at camp so someone had to do the job and that was me mikeyhav. Also that me and mom got into a small yell fight about school payments and shit like that and i feel that i have pissed her off so much... but agian that is me and how a react to things i got so mad at myself and put myself down and shit like that... Then i am alaways sad and not happy when i talk to someone on the phone and i am sorry but that is what someone of my days are like ok... I am trying to be a better person as for being a better person mentally and reacting better around poeple about shit and stuff like that... its hard for me to just say whats bothering me or whats wrong b/c in the past when i did talk to poeple they would say (stop being a baby about and group up or get over it and shit like that) so thats why i am a little slow about telling whats wrong with me. I am a happy person but maybe i jsut do that to make poeple think that everything is just fine with me and sometimes its true that i am doing that to run away from whats really hurting inside of me. I wish sometimes i could just run away from my life and live a new and better one... i dont know why i think like that... So this is how i feel rightnow and i feel that i have hurt someone tongiht in some way or form... one last thing is that i am sorry poeple if i was ever a idiot or stupid for something that i did wrong.

yours truly,
mikeyhav